Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents

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• I am particularly passionate about working with adult children of emotionally immature or narcissistic parents.  The clients I have worked with who have struggled with these types of relationships have reported:

  • Feeling their worth is derived from "what I do" vs. "who I am"

  • Not feeling "seen or heard" growing up

  • Overwhelming feelings of shame and guilt; always feeling responsible when things go wrong

  • Challenges with boundary-setting and getting needs met

  • Not being able to trust their own experiences or feelings... being told they are "too sensitive" or "dramatic"

  • Having an uncanny ability to read others and "take on" other people's emotions

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I am trained in Dr. Karyl Mcbride's 5 Step Recovery Model for treating adult children of narcissistic parents.

1. Acceptance and Grief: this phase allows us to process the trauma of not having an emotionally available, consistent, and attuned caregiver.  I typically utilize EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization Reprocessing) or Brainspotting during this phase to support clients with healing and working towards acceptance of the limitations of the caregiver(s).

2. Separation/Individuation: we will work together to support you with developing a separate sense of self from the identified narcissist.  You will learn to identify what is a projection from the narcissist to challenge negative and untrue thoughts about self.

3. Building Your Authentic Self: you will learn strategies to reparent your inner child and learn how to embrace your authentic self, without feelings of fear/obligation/guilt.

4. Boundary-setting: you will receive support in setting boundaries with the identified narcissistic.  Whether you choose to go no-contact or have more limited interactions, I will support you with identifying what level of contact feels "right" for you.

5. Ending the Legacy: you will take a closer look at your current relationships and parenting to identify any narcissistic traits or "generational ick" as I call it, to avoid passing these qualities on and ending the negative cycle.